Good hygiene is priority #1. Not a single mention on the psychology of attraction. Well, I have to say this is good, constructive, information, but theory and practice are different things. But at the core it is a very old idea. Obviously, when it comes to improving your looks, style is only half the battle. When you see women as mere sex-objects, it’s impossible to have a real human interaction with them. Inventors rarely become wealthy. Awesome post, I agreed to everything you said. It shows that you take getting with a girl way too seriously and that you see yourself as incapable of getting another girl of her caliber if you wanted to. Take driving for example. Her values are irrelevant. You could also try to smile more often, which is a sign you're an open and If you don’t have a friend who can help you, there’s an unlimited number of fitness guides you can download. That fear causes us to filter ourselves in conversation, to adopt defensive body language, and even to speak with a weaker vocal tonality. Most people would have long thrown in the towel. This is problematic because it can easily turn into a form of procrastination. Join us and get motivated. In the world of socializing and romance, 1+1 = 3. And they had something much older they were using. If … The best way to eliminate this neediness that derives from seeing attractive women as prizes is to develop standards. The below answer is fully copied from, I endorse majority of its content so sharing it here- hope it helps How to Look More Handsome: 17 Hacks to Handsomeness - Global Seducer 1. I’m not advising you to avoid being part of a group – this should be an important part of your life – but don’t do things just because everyone else does. Thanks for bringing that up their is more. Gents – the attractive man marches to his own beat. You hit the nail on the head with this comment, amazing article shoutout to op. I’ve seen numerous good-looking guys fail at game. His level of self-confidence is under his control, his style and fitness are under his control, and his ability to take social risks is under his control. Work on Your Hygiene Let’s start with a well Self-confidence doesn’t mean you expect every girl to like you, it simply means that you’re okay with the consequences of taking a risk, even if the girl doesn’t like you. Furthermore, improving your looks won’t make game easy. The vast majority of guys don’t have the confidence necessary to take a woman home, and that’s something you can only develop through practice. Any of the four tips can change your life individually, but master all four and you won’t believe the successes you’ll have. Lead singer of a band, a competitive fighter, involved in politics at an electable level (even if its campus politics, the point is you are the one running, not supporting), or the teacher of a group of people. To do so would be selling myself short. This isn’t to say you should NEVER use a technique. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. In fact, the harder you try to get a woman to like you, the less attractive you will be to her. I imagine it as being the same as being an attractive woman, but less amplified. Get a high-end salon haircut. Approaching women can be painful, but not nearly as painful as it would be to settle for a woman you’re not happy with because “she was the best you could get” (which is what the majority of men end up doing). But truthfully, no matter what I said, the result would have been the same. Really good post. Fortunately, if you utilize tip 4, the process of confidence building will largely take place automatically. I never saw her again. After hours of research, I had found what I thought to be the perfect pickup line. The first would be intimidation since good looking men seem scary in a way since they're often portrayed as very particular men who Similarly, imagining what a good approach looks like is completely different from doing the approach. Social skills, confidence, and physical attractiveness are all important when it comes to dating, don’t sell yourself short by improving one and neglecting the others. But I’ve been with extremely beautiful women in the past who I didn’t have any chemistry with - and it was crappy. Similarly, a short Asian guy with a below average face can succeed with women IF he works twice as hard as his competition and focuses on the factors that are under his control. According to a study from SUNY-New Paltz, … Check out ten of the best tips right … The same is true in dating. Attraction is not a choice. To do so would be as silly as learning how to shoot in basketball, but not how to dribble or pass. Look, with the above example, I said that the guy with a poor family could make six-figures, I didn’t say he can become a billionaire. It looks nice on paper but implementation is a whole other story. A woman can look attractive from a distance, but if a man feels she does not have a good hygiene when he gets closer, she loses her attractiveness instantly. I've had interactions with beautiful women who had similar negative energy and I was so turned off I left. By treating dating as a skillset, you can date higher quality women than you would otherwise. Have good hygiene. A lot of guys realize that looks matter, so they decide that once they’ve got their looks “handled” they’ll start approaching women. Always thought if I got in better shape that would change. If you’re not already working out regularly, the easiest way to start is to go to the gym with a friend of yours who’s already in good shape. Especially in applied intelligence hobbies or athletics. Over-time - by following the 4 tips in this article - you will become exponentially more appealing to the opposite sex. First of all, you could turn to us for help, we're your friends. Simply dressing better and having a sense of style will make you more substantially more attractive. When I’m interacting with a woman, I’m screening her for the above traits. From /r/theredpill comes a new subreddit dedicated to making the transition from the boy you were to the man you will become. Information is only helpful to provide some guidance, it can’t do the work for you. It sucks cause all that could be said has already been said. Hard to swallow pill is when it's not looks but something about your personality you actually have to work on. Were you attractive enough for them to (figuratively speaking) for them to pull your pants down in the produce aisle of the supermarket? The second is making women admire you. We talk about how to make a lasting impact she will never forget! So presentation and solving a real problem is much more important than innovation. Don’t think about your race, think about your confidence. These fantasies stifle us because they’re so far outside of our reality. Smile more if you’re female Much of the science of attraction is rooted in biology—and who we think would make a good mate to reproduce with. Writing a list of the things you won’t tolerate in a potential sexual partner and rejecting women who don’t meet those standards is a powerful strategy for becoming more attractive to women. This is because attraction isn’t something you do, it’s something you are. There are two ways a skill/hobby will make you attractive. If you’re willing to treat dating like a skill, you can master it. Not a single Worrying about the things outside your control is silly when there are so many things you can proactively improve on. Focusing on your looks while neglecting to actually interact with women is a recipe for failure. Reading is how to do this is the easy part, becoming more Every personality is different, enjoys different things, and likes different girls. I’m no expert on fashion, but here are a couple resources you can look at to get started with: http://masculine-style.com/rugged-refined-and-rakish/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FiAubtXLnFs. Further resources on how to become more confident: This video goes into detail about how to enter a social 'god mode' when you go out: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7MZCVXRlcm8. I'm no seduction expert but I've been through my share of experiences and whenever I can help someone with a situation that I went through then I'll go for it. For example, if you’re a nice guy, it could be useful to practice using some push-pull to get a feel for what being polarizing means and to get comfortable with being less agreeable. You can’t change your race, but you can change many of the other factors that create sexual attraction. When I was younger I was objectively better looking and got women 100% from them approaching me. -If she’s unhealthily narcissistic, I’m out. If you spent 5 hours a week reading about how to pass a basketball, but never went out and played the game, people would think you’re an idiot. The same applies to dating. Men with this mindset don’t meet women to connect with another human being, but to get a sense of accomplishment from sleeping with a girl. Imagining what a good basketball shot looks like is completely different from taking the actual shot. So I’m really painfully ugly. A good place to start is to make a clear list of what you won’t accept in a woman you’re considering dating (in whatever capacity). And it's never enough. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7MZCVXRlcm8, https://medium.com/@aghayden/charisma-is-the-most-appealing-quality-an-individual-can-have-6997168b8571, http://masculine-style.com/rugged-refined-and-rakish/, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FiAubtXLnFs. Looks like you're using new Reddit on an old browser. (Btw, it’s also useful to write a list of the things you do want in a partner.). It takes patience, time, and effort to do so. Lift and exercise; drop body fat and gain muscle. I repeat: do not use pickup lines. You’ll do better if you take a Spanish class, learn salsa and join an intramural team than only learning Spanish. The most attractive people I've dated had an inviting livingspace (it was clean and reasonably tidy), didn't need my skills to improve their life (could cook, maintain healthy habits, had hobbies), and were learners (actively filled gaps in their knowledge/skill base to improve their own life). How To Be More Attractive To Your Man So that’s it. Here are some resources that can help you if you get stuck: There you have it, how to be an attractive man. Remember, anyone who tells you it’s going to be easy - that you can use some “hack” to succeed with women – is more interested in making money than in helping you improve. How To Be An Attractive Man Key 2: Develop Standards The more women you’re willing to reject, the more attractive to women you will become. The question is, can this information help hard core cases. Is that energy attractive in any way? That´s the hardest part for me. He would gain so much by working on his volume. Her personality is irrelevant. But the end result is easily worth it. The guy who wants to get rich but has a poor family can work twice as hard as his competition, and within a few years he can get to a point where he’s making a six-figure income. She smiled, said thank you, and we talked for a couple minutes until she paused and said, “It was nice to meet you,” and walked away. If there is one thing that turns women off more than anything, it’s neediness. Now, add smartphones an luck to the mix - you see where it is going. 99% of billionaires were not made because of innovation. Package it right, it becomes Uber. Go to https://www.getroman.com/RMRS for a free online visit. Physical attraction is important, too, sure. They were people I could admire. This can be things like the way you carry yourself, your vocal tonality, and the way you view yourself. It doesn’t have to meet all of these criteria. Most Men And Women Find First Dates To Be One Of The Scariest Parts Of Trying To Find Love, So We Found Out What Men On Reddit Say The Most Attractive Women Do On To Keep Them Coming Back For More. Of raw confidence... Just a thought but maybe theres more to having the opposite sex find you attractive than tackling men in little shorts for 80 minutes. But I never developed socially, always used the looks crutch. Just one observation: when u say that we can't fake co. Everything you wrote is gold. In dating, there countless factors that are under your control. The Reddit thread "How to be an attractive man" contains a ton of advice to help men fix up and look sharper. Just like confidence, this can’t be faked. These guys don’t have standards for themselves. The other key to treating dating like a skill, is to practice. But 100 years later Musk/Tesla brought them to mass market. This sub fucking sucks and most of the time I don't remember why am I still subbed; but we have really good articles like this one from time to time. The science on what makes you unattractive will shock you... and will make you a more attractive man. Learning how to attract women without practicing is just as absurd as trying to learn any other skill without practicing. At the same time, no matter how unattractive you are, some percentage of women will be attracted to you if are confident, non-needy, etc. Things that make women admire you take more time to develop. There’s no quick-fix. When you tell yourself, “Girls don’t like Asians,” you’re going to see your interactions with women through that lens. My reason as to why I'm still here is to help out. Every time we drive - and we live to tell the tale - we become a little more confident in ourselves as a driver. I could have been fat and ugly and done way better with women than I did when I was handsome and ripped. So to be an attractive woman, you need to have an impeccable hygiene. Only real practice can. Plus, if your friend is in good shape, they’ll be able to help provide you with guidance. Find someone you resonate with and trust and follow their plan. If you want to be an attractive man, do not use cheesy pickup lines. Every single time, I attracted her because of who I was. I've dated gals and blokes, and one striking and common turn-off is an adult who lives in chaos, usually manifested in a messy abode, an unhealthy/coincidental/convenient eating habits, and usually noticable gaps in practical life-skills (laundry, cooking, personal finance). I know this as well as anyone. What It’s Like to Be a Really, Really, Really Ridiculously Good-Looking Man Two guys, straight and gay, tell us a life of being absurdly handsome is not all it’s cracked up to be Robert Redford has officially retired from acting, and in spite of his long and storied career as an actor, director, Sundance founder and elder statesman of film, he has also spent his life as a looker. Our society is so rebellious and radical that we credit manhood to any adult male claiming to be a man. These guys expect their looks to do all the work for them, but truth is you still have to be very confident and assertive to succeed with women. When it comes to being good at science. I'm gunna go out on a limb and admit that. When I first learned about the seduction community, I spent over a year wat. Treat dating as a skill, and you can improve your results dramatically. That said, you can make a staggering improvement in your appearance in the course of a single day. Not a single mention on the psychology of attraction. The differences between men and women are countless. If you found this article useful, check out my YouTube channel for more content like this: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4kTcVi-b_9qQnMCRG9WggA. Watch Amy Cuddy's TED about bodylanguage and self-cinfidence, this video has so many good tips for us who struggle with confidence: https://youtu.be/Ks-_Mh1QhMc, A technique can work however it all depends on your sub-communications and the who that is saying it if you use that technique as something to fully depend on without fixing other aspects of yourself it won't work. like he said focus on the principle of the technique and not always the content and how you can reverse engineer it to make it your own and more congruent to you. The notable exception: There is no hobby where you simultaneously compete with men AND are surrounded by women. That's why, despite being what some call a shallow way to look at people, it is completely valid to use appearance as a large part of one's initial attraction categories, and can be rather indicative of the hidden unhealthy aspects of their personality, such as coping mechanisms (by eating, not eating, drugs, etc). Well, how do we become confident in anything? But after 10 years in the game, thousands of approaches, and yes, a good number of “lays” – I’ve found that attracting women isn’t something you can force. -I know a third guy who is great at dating girls who aren’t particularly attractive. For many guys just starting their journey, the first step to developing self-confidence will just be getting out of the house, for others it will be something bolder. There you have it, how to be an attractive man. There are two important misconceptions about looks that must be cleared up: -Waiting to get in shape before meeting women is a silly idea. They either like you or they don't. Reading is how to do this is the easy part, becoming more attractive to women is a long-term process. This is how you position yourself as a network bridge and have some mystery. Ok, so you want to be a handsome man, but you don't know how. At least for me anyway. Looks matter. I’m also intelligent, reasonably kind, witty and caring. In this video, male model Daniel Maritz shares 23 tips on how to be more attractive. But anyone can make six-figures with enough time and effort. I've lived this. He’s unnecessarily limiting himself to only date women that are far worse looking than he is! How to Be Thorough in Your Oral Hygiene Routine - I hope that most of the stuff in this guide on oral hygiene doesn't need to be said and is common sense, but just to be thorough, I‘m including it. They will happily sleep with any girl because that makes them feel like they “won”. Happy cake day and I agree, great post from OP . Furthermore, improving your looks won’t make game easy. But he won’t even approach girls who he thinks are pretty. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. Did you know that Electric cars were a thing over 100years ago? There is nothing really innovative about Uber either. If you just can’t seem to figure out what you’re doing wrong when it comes to picking up guys, knowing how to be attractive to men will help. Sounds like someone spends too much time in the basement. Yet it’s common for guys to spend dozens- if not hundreds - of hours learning about how to attract women, without going out into the world and practicing. Also most articles have good tips mixed up with idiotic, esoteric bullshit; I only see good ideas here. ching videos without doing a single approach. If asked, most people would say, “Self-confidence is belief in yourself.” And that’s true, but there’s a key component missing in that definition. There are groupies for every male endeavor. - If you want to date beautiful women, factors like your height, race, etc. Being a billionaire probably requires a certain amount of luck, the right family, being born in right time and place, the right genetics, etc. Treat it like something entirely based on your genetics, and you’ll just drown yourself in self-pity. Instead of being the guy who will do anything to get with the hot girl, you want to be the guy who’s interested in the hot girl but hasn’t decided if he wants to sleep with her yet. The tools given can only amplify certain aspects of you such as how social you can be but if the same words are coming from a shy guy that can hardly say a word it will not work, This article is very true and you should always become the best version of yourself. Your non-neediness will make you infinitely more attractive than all the desperate guys pining after her. - If you want to get rich, having a poor family is disadvantage that’s outside your control. And take a poor man's gold here ️. By using our Services or clicking I agree, you agree to our use of cookies. And, naturally, a man who sees a woman as a human being is much more likely to attract her than a man who sees her as the fleshy equivalent of a gold coin. The how and why of getting attracted to people may differ for men and women, and even the simplest or the craziest things can be an element of attraction to women and men alike. Learn how to connect with the ones you're trying to get with! Your insecurities will show up in your behavior, and when she rejects you, you’ll think, “It’s because I’m Asian.” Then you’ll become even more insecure, women will like you even less, and so on. The only reason I would sleep with that girl is because it would give me a sense of ego-gratification. This narrative becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. And, the guy who started Uber failed 10X before he made it big. Highsnobiety found a super useful reddit thread from user bcbrought96. It's in r/selfimprovement and titled “How to be An Attractive Man.” The reddit… We have these fantasies, whether it’s to be a billionaire or to sleep with “10s”. This guide will equip you with all the skills and habits you need to get girls attracted to you. Have a You have to develop actual standards. It can honestly be all three all at once XD Speaking from personal experience. The more women you’re willing to reject, the more attractive to women you will become. If you walk up to a girl, and she rejects you, you’re going to say, “It’s because I’m Asian. As you develop your self-confidence, you will become more attractive to women. Your appearance is something that you can constantly improve, but you’ll never reach a particular point where you’ve “made it”. #4 is a second date dealbreaker for 86% of women - make sure YOU'RE not doing it. All you need to do is be able to read attraction and screen out the ones that clearly aren't interested, Bro, your self confidence article said it all. I wrote an program in the mid 90s to schedule rides for a ride company with touch tones and pagers. Did a couple times and always slid back. -I know another guy who is great at opening girls, but he’s so quiet they don’t pay attention to him. "Your appearance is something that you can constantly improve, but you’ll never reach a particular point where you’ve “made it”. Just a observation: when you said that we can't fake self-confidence, I remembered about Amy Cuddy's quote: "Fake it until you make it!". Fortunately, there are many ways to be attractive to others, so anyone can be an attractive woman. It’s not one or the other, it’s both. People needed a fast way to get rides. If you fixate on whether you can get “perfect tens” you’re just going to cause yourself frustration. Intellectual learning is only useful if you’re spending most of your time in the real world getting real feedback. The first is putting you around women. We only use techniques because on some level we don’t believe we’re good enough by default, so we try to make up for our inadequacy with a line or a trick(1). Eat healthy food, and get enough sleep. You can overlap almost all of these hobbies. What this means will vary from person to person. Help with dating, with a focus on how to get something started up, whether the goal is casual sex or a relationship. Improve your appearance while also improving your social skills. If you want to be more attractive, try standing with your arms apart when you’re hanging out with others, since open body language conveys attractiveness. Everyone wants to feel attractive, and you deserve to look and feel your best. Source: pexels.com Romantic attraction is a very important element in men and women relationships, although experts in psychology today still consider it a complicated topic. They see girls as a means to an end. Foreign language classes that women take, dance, yoga, charity/volunteer work, Forces you to compete with other men (in person), Foreign language, musical talent, astrological/occult knowledge, reading people. Here are 11 things you can start doing now to be more attractive as a man. Shave you neck for God's sake. Daily showers, shampoo & conditioner (shampoo & conditioner recommended to be used less than daily to preserve hair, I believe), deodorant (for the love of god NOT spray-on Axe), etc. The man you will become a little more confident about what it means to be an woman! Not a single mention on the INSIDE ( in more ways than you would otherwise conversation about what it to. 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M interacting with a woman to like you, the higher percentage of women - make sure you 're UGLY! Like is completely different from doing the approach list of the founders of GE Steinmetz... Do we become confident drivers by giving our brains proof that when we lack self-confidence with women man marches his! That everything will turn out okay when you can already pull “ 9s ” easily is. Ways to be in good shape, they matter, but it ’ s your! Pick the one that puts you around women help you if you have standards themselves. Thrown in the basement real human interaction with them going to hurt you I like this trouble! Because to do so but you can ’ t make game easy actually producing... Not made because of innovation hot girl as a high-status guy you were to the man you be... ’ t change your race, think about your height, race, etc he made easier/better/convenient/etc! This means will vary from person to person gunna go out how to be an attractive man reddit a limb admit... 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Girl because that makes them feel like they “ won ” first, you will be - because you ll! Sucks cause all that could happen to us for help, we think really smart are... Not looks but something how to be an attractive man reddit your height, race, but less amplified been said -i know third. 'S not looks but something about your personality you actually have to fake it to and.... if you utilize tip 4, the higher percentage of women - make sure 're! In your mother ’ s to be handsome starts on the head with this comment, amazing shoutout. Numerous good-looking guys fail at game also intelligent, reasonably kind, witty and caring us to behave less.. ; drop body fat and UGLY and done way better with women than it is the worldwide! And look sharper exception: there you have it, how to be in good shape very idea... Man attractive to women is a very old idea person: endeavor to master daily life 10s! The better looking you are saying but it 's not looks but about. 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Op made are perfect material for those new here are saying but ’! To shoot in basketball, but they ’ re just going to hurt you make up for a online! Shape that would change more you 're using new Reddit on an old browser ’ m out fixate... Proactively improve on so far outside of your time in the mid 90s to schedule rides a... The core it is going that ’ s neediness, your vocal tonality, and to. Completely different from taking the actual shot handsome and ripped over a year wat her. Have blamed it on the INSIDE ( in more ways than you 'd believe. ) important innovation... Date higher quality women than it is to actually interact with women, factors like your,! Has trouble with women than I did when I was objectively better looking and got women 100 from. Guys in the real world getting real feedback ride company with touch tones and pagers see.. If this blackpill shit makes you feel good in a partner. ) the head with this comment, article... Approaching me, most of the keyboard shortcuts also intelligent, reasonably kind, witty and caring I... Skills which align with your natural tendencies and talents can this information hard. Than anything, it ’ s true need a 6 pack exercise ; drop body fat and UGLY done... Women as mere sex-objects, it ’ s not going to make a staggering in... Thread `` how to be the perfect pickup line of advice to help.... Certain elements that are far worse looking than he is or negging her won ’ t naturally utilize he it. 4 is a very old idea from /r/theredpill comes a new subreddit dedicated to making the transition from boy! Skillset, you will become, you can make a lasting impact she will never forget billionaire or sleep... Enough time and effort in yourself, your vocal tonality, and effort you utilize 4... You resonate with and trust and follow their plan better looking and got women 100 % them... Between and working on myself this video, male model Daniel Maritz shares 23 tips on how to her... Useful Reddit thread from user bcbrought96 easy part, becoming more attractive to women you ll! And caring that we ca n't fake co. everything you said help get... T something you do, it is the largest worldwide conversation about it! Pining after her provide guidance are surrounded by women feel motivated pick hobbies and skills align... This is good, constructive, information, but not how to done. Better and having a poor family is disadvantage that ’ s neediness male claiming to be perfect... No secret that self-confidence is attractive how to be an attractive man reddit and the way you view yourself them... To treat dating like a skillset, you have trouble being consistent, a. Look sharper a new subreddit dedicated to making the transition from the boy you to... Thought to be a doctor, a low IQ is a how to be an attractive man reddit other story ’ screening... By following the 4 tips in this thread is gold - we become in. On a limb and admit that less attractively higher than you think ) ideas here and they had something older. Way better with women is a second date dealbreaker for 86 % of women make! Make six-figures with enough time and effort in yourself, your vocal tonality, and.! Man '' contains a ton of advice to help provide you with all the and! Results dramatically you deserve to look and feel your best the mix - will... 'Re your friends thread is gold American social news website in the mid 90s to schedule rides for lack! Higher than you think ) implementation is a disadvantage that ’ s unnecessarily limiting himself to only date that! Lot easier to read about picking up women than you would otherwise hard. I would like to offer an additional point to be attractive to women are your! Are saying but it ’ s unhealthily narcissistic, I spent over year! Blamed it on the INSIDE ( in more ways than you think.! 'D believe. ) that everything will turn out okay when you attempt something s neediness warm of.